Apr 24, 2023

When I got my most recent pregnancy test back, my immediate thought was, “I can’t do this again.” After two previous miscarriages and a long year of fertility treatments, we had decided to put a pause on trying to grow our family. It wasn’t for lack of wanting, but I was so mentally exhausted from navigating the ins and outs of the healthcare system and from constantly trying different medications and vitamins that I was prescribed through it all. I didn’t want to go through yet another miscarriage.

My thoughts throughout that year of infertility often echoed the question that the Apostles asked Jesus about the man who was blind from birth: “Who did sin, this man or his parents?”¹ It was a common belief in biblical times that an affliction such as blindness was a punishment, a sign of God’s judgment on an individual. I often wondered what I was doing wrong. We had fasted and prayed for months before deciding to try for a baby. Had we misinterpreted the revelation we had received? The echoes of “It isn’t the Lord’s timing yet” cut me like a knife as they unintentionally called into question my ability to communicate with my Heavenly Father. I had always dreamed of being a mother, and those two miscarriages weighed so heavily on me. So when I learned that I was once again pregnant, I was already feeling the hurt of another one. Early tests even confirmed that the baby wouldn't make it.

The Savior told His disciples, “Neither hath this man sinned, nor his parents: but that the works of God should be made manifest in him.”² Many of the miracles performed in Christ’s ministry were to manifest the works of God. Today, big and small miracles alike manifest to us the works, power, and love of our Heavenly Father. In my case, with the help of medical professionals and modern medicine and a miracle from the Lord, my little baby began to show signs of growth and health. He was born just a few days ago, healthy as can be.

Christ did not immediately give us a child. However, because of my trials, I have been able to better see the works of God manifest in my life. In the tender mercy of our little one’s birth. In the small everyday moments that carried me through the pain and sorrow of the first two miscarriages—my husband’s neverending patience and comfort, the support of family members who checked in with me and stayed with me on the hard days, the quiet whisperings of the Spirit on temple trips—they all served as little miracles through one of the most difficult times of my life. 

In a letter to his brother Aphek, the prophet Wilford Woodruff said, “I know of a truth that the Lord is giving to his Church, yea, to the Church of Latter-day Saints, the gifts blessings & grace that the Ancients possessed . . . [they] lay hands on the sick and they recover, the lame walk, the blind see, the deaf hear . . . and have the heavens opened unto them.”³ 

I know that through our Savior, Jesus Christ, the works and power of God are made manifest. As we seek these miracles, we will feel His love more abundantly in our lives.

Kaitlin is a Public Relations Intern at the Wilford Woodruff Papers Foundation. She is a senior at BYU in Experience Design Management from Bountiful, Utah, and loves music, baking, and the great outdoors. She and her husband recently had their first child. Kaitlin was drawn to the Project by her love for storytelling and learning from the past to improve the future.